I unfriended you for a reason

Hey there.

Its not you, its me.

Yeah. I’m an introvert. And I like making close, personal relationships which have meaning. I’d rather be alone than be with people I cannot identify with.

And yet…in this age of technology, I may get tempted to add people to my ‘friend’ list. People I shouldn’t have.

8aec995ce357d58697ffe9a6acb6029d

But if I unfriend someone…its usually for one of these reasons:

1. Do i even know you? When did I ever add you? OMFG you have access to all of my information!!!…DELETE

2. I hate you. You have hurt me like no one else has and I have no desire to know every lame detail in your life. You are either an ex – bf or an ex – bff. DELETE

3. We were friends when we were kids…and now you’ve grown up to be a pretentious pain in the ass. Or perhaps I’m the pain in the ass. Point being – we haven’t spoken for over 10 years and I’m sure we won’t for the next 10. DELETE

4. You are a friend of a friend of a friend….ah…a total stranger who I met ONCE and ADDED…never to speak again…DELETE.

5. You post too much shit dawg – I’m tired of seeing your daily ‘I ATE THIS’ update or ‘I’m so drunk every night’ update. Spare me. DELETE.

I know, I know, Ladyhawk sounds all cribby these days eh? Time to bring some sunshine back into the blog. Until then, let me see who else I can delete.

Over n out people…over and out.

The Angel – Part 2

For Part 1 – click here.

————————-

The train came to a halt.

It was 2 AM. Right on schedule. 2:05 and we would be on our way.

I was restless. I had to be. I had approximately two hours left to complete my job and I was having second thoughts.

I got up and walked towards the rear exit. All was quiet. And peaceful.

It was a funny feeling, you know? I should be scared out of my wits but instead, I was feeling…clear…like some sort of clarity was forming inside my head.

All my life, I had been on the run. From something or the other. I had always been afraid for my safety. You know, being a woman in the Middle East and all that. You kind of hate the West, the Europeans…basically you hate everyone who might even be remotely connected to your suffering. Even if they themselves had nothing to do with it. America bombed us. So we hated the entire bunch. And also the Europeans who sent all these weapons to kill us, kill our families, kill our children.

No. I should not think about that.

But more than these foreign pests who had destroyed our economy, I hated the fanatics who ruled over us. Oh yes. I wanted revenge.

I was seething again. Oh blimey. This wasn’t good. Whenever I got mad, I got really, really reckless. And I was getting really, really mad.

My mother used to say that’s why I had red, flaming hair – to match my temper. Perhaps she was right.

It was time for me – the Angel from hell to deliver justice to the one who had ruined everything I had held close to my heart.

—————————–

For more…wait for part 3!

Labyrinthitis

Labyrinthitis is an ailment of the inner ear[1] and a form of unilateral vestibular dysfunction. It derives its name from the labyrinthsthat house the vestibular system, which senses changes in head position. Labyrinthitis can cause balance disorders, vertigo, hearing loss, and tinnitus.

Labyrinthitis is usually caused by a virus, but it can also arise from bacterial infection, head injury, extreme stress, an allergy, or as a reaction to medication. Both bacterial and viral labyrinthitis can cause permanent hearing loss in rare cases.[2]

Labyrinthitis often follows an upper respiratory tract infection (URTI).

Ok, so i took all of that out from Wiki. Why am I posting about medical stuff, you wonder?

Well, a day after my birthday I was feeling extremely wobbly and dizzy. Like I was gonna fall down. Plus, I used to get a constant cold almost every other week. It was driving me nuts, so I decided to go to a doctor. Not just any doc. A good doc!!

I have a milder version of this so called ‘invisible’ disease. And it sucks.

Why?

1 You look normal. Healthy. But you feel sick. Like there’s an earthquake below your feet and you cannot control it. Don’t expect people to feel sympathetic. They won’t be. Cos…you look normal!

2. So because you feel giddy, you feel nauseous. You can’t eat much.

3. You start feeling anxious and lose out on self – confidence.

I got my ‘version’ of it, like I call it from a constant cold/cough which apparently caused an inner ear infection.

The doc says I’ll be fine. I just need to take care and build on my immunity and have cod liver oil and vitamin B-complex for the rest of my life, along with walks everyday.

Well, so far I’ve been taking the supplements and they seem to have helped.  Now , from feeling dizzy a couple of times in a day, it happens 2-3 times in a week for a minute or so. Walks…I promised myself I’d be more regular.

And oh – if you are stressed or unhappy, it makes things worse. So don’t get stressed. About anything. It will NOT help your case.

All of you, who suffer from this – don’t worry. I understand your pain. Drop me a note if you want to talk about it.

Lots of love,

Ladyhawk

Tove Lo – Talking Body

It has been a while since I posted some music on this thing. I like this girl. She reminds me a lot of what I used to be (though i was far from being this crazy haha). I am merely reposting as a fan, no claims to this video.

The Angel – Part 1

I am sitting on a corner seat…like I always do.

It is a rather pleasant ride, you could say. As a child, I used to love train journeys. They made me a bit nauseous; you know – the to and fro motion? But I am a big girl now.

I checked my watch. It was 10 AM. Still pretty early. We were half-way through to our final destination.

‘Final Destination.’  That was the name of some horror movie, wasn’t it? Sounded quite ominous; to be frank.

‘ Mama look!’

A little child ran down the aisle – pointing outside. It had started to snow. Tiny, shimmering snow-flakes ; falling from the heavens.

Heaven. Who knew if it existed or not in reality?

I did. As a child, my mother used to tell me about heaven and hell and the difference between right and wrong. She was a darling, a shining light. Was. I lost her a couple of years ago to cancer.

And with her death, my last tie to anything beautiful died.

They say that everyone has a dark side. They couldn’t be more right.

But not me. I am an angel.